emotion, life, love, self care

I am

I am strong.

I am sensitive.

I am beautiful.

I am allowed to feel EVERY emotion and not feel guilty.

I am selfless and I will not let anyone tell me otherwise, no matter who you are. And if you are in my circle and you think I am not, then I have the power to remove you from my circle.

I create my circle.

I create my life. I don’t get another life. I get this one.

I am worthy.

I deserve hopeless romantic love.

I will not feel trapped and lost trying to live for others. I will spend my life living.

NO ONE defines me. I define me.

I am allowed to cry and be sad. That is not weak. For that is strong and powerful.

I will no longer feel trapped by trying to track every little thing I do or eat. I am forever done trying to fit the societal norm- our houses have to be perfectly neat. We have to be perfect moms with crafts all prepped for the week. We have to be skinny with no flab over our stomachs because every single girl posts pictures like that…including me (to fit in and because I am afraid to be judged.)

I will not judge.

I am not one size fits all. I am me. God (or whoever you believe) made ME the way he wanted me to be. He crafted MY HEART. I will not guard my heart for this is WHO I AM.

I will not be disrespected and I will not break.

And if I break, I will break for a minute until I can lean on my circle to put me back together.

I will keep on collecting those moments that make me feel alive and happy and worthy. I will take as many pictures and videos as I want because I can and because those are memories that I can relive over and over. Because when I break and I need to come back to life, I will replay the pictures and videos of those moments I want to keep collecting.

I am confident.

I deserve LOVE from all who cross my path. And those who don’t portray it will teach me what I don’t want and what I don’t deserve. I have the power to remove them. I will not let toxicity into my life.

I will take 10 minutes a day ALONE to talk to God, myself, and really dig deep in my soul. I have learned that I am constantly trying to keep my mind occupied (TV, running, Internet scrolling) to escape my own traumas. I will not let my traumas destroy my soul.

I am a good mother.

I try to be a good wife.

I still don’t know who I am and that’s okay.

I still don’t know what I want to do and that’s okay. Although deep in my soul, I know I was meant to be a nurse.

I still don’t know if this is where I am supposed to end up and that’s okay.

I was supposed to be their mom. They have saved me. They have given me purpose. They have given me life. They have taught me what love is. And love isn’t always pretty, but it is unconditional, strong and will endure anything.

I am allowed to complain sometimes. For those that listen are those that are my people. You know who you are (SF).

I don’t have to suck in in every picture.

I don’t have to look a certain way for approval. I only have to approve myself.

I know I was supposed to meet every single person that has crossed my path. I am forever thankful for EVERY SINGLE PERSON that I have come in contact with. You have left a mark on my soul. “We don’t meet people by accident, they are meant to cross our paths for a reason, either they change our life or we change theirs.” Thank you Mitch.

I will let go of all the resentment in my soul.

I will trust the process.

I will believe in myself.

I will practice self-love and NOT feel guilty.

I will get through the hard times. I will collect the good times.

I have a GOOD heart.

I AM ENOUGH.

If you haven’t already noticed, I was inspired by Glennon Doyle’s book “Untamed”. I am at a point in my life where I am feeling a little lost and this book has been amazing and eye-opening for me. We live in an unconventional life right now. Most people have heightened emotions, marriages are stressed, we are feeling overworked, overwhelmed, bored, confused, lost. I am navigating MY life the best way I know how. Thank you to everyone in my circle. Please remember: whoever is reading this, this is for you. You are loved. You are worth it ALL. You will get through whatever you are going through.

Tish is sensitive, that is her superpower. The opposite of sensitive is not brave. It’s not brave to refuse to pay attention, to refuse to notice, to refuse to feel and know and imagine. The opposite of sensitive is insensitive, and that’s no badge of honor. -Glennon Doyle

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